Running In Circles

My impulsive signing up for the KL Marathon (10km) has made me a more 'active' person - going for jogs/walks on a weekly basis. The up side:

1. I've discovered that my leg muscles don't suffer from acute oxygen debts anymore. I used to get muscle fatigue for a week right after doing some exerting activities!
2. It has set a platform for a different kind of activity to do with friends (before, it was just hanging out in malls, eating, starbucks)
3. I've finally stepped foot in the TTDI park, which is the best so far (in terms of low air pollution, cleanliness, the type of crowd there)
4. I'm starting to make good use of my sportswear (e.g. the purple suede adidas shoes i bought in Singapore in 2006)
5. Zack and I have had a chance to bond. I take him out for walks/jogs around the playground, as companion and protection against some 'people' who are trying to be funny with me
6. I'm leading a healthier lifestyle?

The down side:
1. After discovering that my purple adidas shoes weren't running shoes, and feedback from a couple of friends found that improper shoes could harm my feet, I started on a hunt for running shoes. My requisites: running shoes (duh!), not too expensive, light, don't look like a dinosaur, visualy pleasing, proper brand
2. Multiple let downs because of cancelled jogging appointments
3. Knee pains as a result of overexertion (2 consecutive days of jogging)
4. Spending more money because after jogging with friends, we will adjourn to dinner

So, now to the tale of the photo of the shoes above. The pair on the left is my old shoes which I cought in Singapore 3 years back (I didn't realise it was the latest design at the time, I just liked the suede part and its colour). I'd only realise it was the latest when I saw a Channel [V] VJ wear it on tv... and a couple of months later I saw some guys wearing it (different colour, of course!) around the Klang Valley.

The pair on the right (0f the photo) is the new running shoes I just bought at the adidas warehouse sale this weekend. I googled it and found that its name is Epesi, under the Stella McCartney range of adidas shoes. I think it looks rather unique and its sparkly! However, my googling efforts has also yielded reviews which say that the shoe is not good for jogging (my bubble just burst! did you hear the "pop!"?). I'd been feeling so good ever since I bought the shoes until this hour when I read the review... Anyway, it cost only RM120 (which is cheap). At first I thought that the shoe was a size too small, but turns out my purple suede pair is the same size! Lucky thing I took the risk and bought it!

I'd seen another Stella McCartney running shoes at the warehouse sale on Saturday - viharunner. At first, it was the only choice left and I was hesitating because when I tried it on, the top part was abit too snug for my liking and well, the design and the size kind of made it abit elvish looking. It was black with some shining PVC strips with yellow lining. All because of the tightness, I decided not to get that shoe. Then walking around, I saw a pair (only ONE pair) of the silver epesi! When I tried it, it was looser (but fitted well) and since it was quite good looking, I decided to buy it! Now, I kind of regret not choosing the black shoes, because according to reviews, the viharunner is quite a good running shoes! :(

All in all, at least now I have a pair of running shoes to use. And I thank my crapping partner for telling me about the warehouse sale at the last minute on Friday (truely thank, NOT sarcastically).

What's Eating SM's Properties?

First it was the rubber components on my cell phone. Now it's my wallet. Something's been munching my properties! And this muncher lives somewhere in the nooks and crannies of my room! And the sneaky critter seem to know when I'm not in the room or when I'm fast asleep... then it comes out and chomp my rubber and leather stuffs.

The funny thing is... I'm quite sure one night I woke up and was thinking what was that scrapping sound... but went back to sleep thinking that it was just my imagination! haha

So continues the mystery of SM and the rubber/leather chomper!

Replaced

The feeling of being replaced is sad and tiring. But the changes are taking effect gradually, so it's only wise to adapt to them. Starting with practicing how to distance oneself, to avoid being too emotionally dependent on certain relationships (three in particular, don't ask). Although 'no man is an island', this earth inhabitant has to start standing on her own two legs, swimming out to sea and finding a solitary island to inhabit. Only when true independence is achieved can one venture back for a visitation and appreciate the good that the new replacement has produced.

When one stops expecting, he or she will cease getting disappointed. But when there are no expectations, there is only numbness. Numbness to dull the singularity, the void. However, numbness isn't all too bad, it is like a buffering blanket which grants one with immunity from hurt. So embrace your numbness - it is your shield, your protection and weapon. It may be one's only earthly option to stay sane.

Note: Another set of ramblings. Looking too deep into simple situations of tom yam, waiting under tree and wishful thinking. It was good while it lasted. So now, what's left is to crumple this parchment up and throw it into the waste paper basket (figuratively speaking).

The Faithful Leaf

This here is a leaf which refused to blow off all the way from Mutiara Damansara to Shah Alam. At first I was hoping for it to fly away while I was driving (because it was distracting my eyes from the road) but when it refused to budge as I was approaching Kelana Jaya, I started hoping that it would stick with me till Shah Alam. And it did!

I wonder why this leaf stuck on my windshield all the way? It has developed a love affair with my windshield? An affinity between plant cells and tampered glass? Probably not. It's more probable to attribute this phenom to surface tension of water. It had rained abit earlier and the leaf was affixed to my windshield by a droplet of rain water. But it is a funny thing that the droplet did not dry up in the wind when i drove from PJ to Shah Alam!

Angry? Me? Nah...

Being a Narcissus, I randomly browsed back my previous posts and found that quite a few of them were written in an angry manner... which makes me wonder - whether I was actually an angry youth in denial all this while? The truth is I write best when I'm worked up with emotion, which manifest best in its most pungent form - anger! And yes, I do admit to getting angry quickly over small matters... which I thought nobody noticed (since I'm usually very quiet among strangers)... but apparently some people did notice, and I'm now labelled as a chili padi (bird's eye chili).

Anyway, the point of this post is that although I may appear to be angry in an unending string of posts, bear in mind of what was mentioned above - my state of mind and motivation when creating a post! Somehow happy moments never seem to stir up such intense emotions for me to turn on the computer, fight for the internet connection, then deal with the horrible streamyx connection, thinking up of how to start the post off, getting into the mood of writing, knowing when is enough and not becoming a word-overkill, figuring out how to wind up the post, avoid veering into another topic, then cracking my head for an appropriate title and finally clicking "PUBLISH POST"... in the event that streamyx fails me yet another time, the whole process needs to be repeated again (with less dexterity and obvious laclustre). So there you go... blogging is such a bother! I don't know why I continue to do it!! hahaha....

P.S: The reason I blog is this:
1) I get to express my feelings anonymously (maybe not my identity, but that of the persons whom I dislike/love) and therefore preventing me from going mad with pent up emotions
2) I get to flex my writing skills - improve, experiment and a good opportunity to use bombastic words which I can't use in daily writing and speaking (for fear of being stereotyped as a word nerd)
3) I get to put down into writing (or more appropriately classified as softcopy) my memories, thoughts and ideas so that they won't become extinct when I start forgetting (which is already occurring as I type this... hmm... what did I eat for dinner??)

Profile Update

I've changed my profile picture from


monster zack (which was generated using one of the applications on zefrank's website) to


a hibiscus picture I took last year in Tanarimba Janda Baik during one our family weekend away in the mountains.

If you're looking for an explanation behind this picture choice, there isn't one... I just felt that Zacko's mirror image was getting a bit stale. After all, it's been there for a couple of years! There is no significance behind this hibiscus picture... I just used it because it looks nice and I can sleep in peace knowing that I will not stand a chance at being persecuted for copyright infringement!!

If you're asking why I don't post my own photo (of myself), it's because I'm just too damned ugly... hahaha... no, no... it's because I'm just too paranoid at disclosing a picture of ME! (although many of the people stopping by here would actually know how I look already... hehe)

I've also added an answer to a random question by Blogger.com in my profile. :0)

And it's quite embarrassing to admit that my blog template has not been perfected (although it's been months!)... I need to find the time to sit down and go through the CSS, adjusting it to see what effects take place. If YOU happen to know how to right the alignment problems in my blog template, please leave a comment! thanks!!

Maybe I'm Just Being Defensive, But Hear Me Out!

Shame-facedly, I must admit that Facebook has become an integral part of my day and like the millions of complains about 'overly-liberal' wall posts, status updates and comments, I have recently followed suit in becoming yet another statistic. One who has read a 'status update' and feels inflamed to issue a rebuttal to its content.

Yes, this may be the cowardly way of handling the matter - instead of replying straight to that 'status update', thus looking the devil in the eye... But I believe that a little bit of diplomacy is required in handling such touchy sensitive issues. It is highly unlikely that the person in question (or any other persons who know that person) would stumble upon this post in this obscure blog, therefore I feel it is a safe medium to air my disagreement where my criticism would have minimal negative effect on that person and perhaps some unknowing reader may learn a thing or two (hopefully). While at the same time I get to pen down (or rather, type) my two cents worth of the matter.

Friends, family, colleagues, and true acquaintances would know that I do not speak, write or understand any of the dialects in the Chinese languages (ok, maybe I can get away with 5% of Cantonese). While this is not a fact to be glorified upon (by myself), I do not feel any shame of this 'disability' (as some may view it). As smug as this may sound, I believe it is what has made me ME today - my level of proficiency in English, my viewpoint of the world, my sense of responsibility to the society - it has all had an integral part in my education process and upbringing and I do not fault my parents for not 'teaching me Chinese' or sending me to a Chinese school, as every parent has their own style of rearing their kids. This was my parents' method. And perhaps many will have the opinion that "so what? SM isn't great or anything, what's the point?", the point being that, at least I turned out right. I don't go stirring up shit in an already massively-stinking cesspool of insensitivity (which we have aplenty in this country as it is) and I was raised with enough tact not to publicly undermine certain groups of people (which incidentally includes a number of your own friends).

Everyone on this Earth is different, with different talents and abilities, different characters and levels of intelligence. Some of these qualities are inborn while the others may be acquired and no two persons will have the same level of talent or ability to learn. And as we all pride ourselves in being a 'civilised' generation, it is saddening to see that some people cannot accept this fact and feel that they have the right to stand on their high and mighty pedestal of superiority whilst judging those who do not measure up to their 'standards'. No human is perfect! Some may be blessed with a little more, while others have a little less. So let those who 'have' not scoff at the 'have-nots', and instead practice a little bit of humanity by helping out the latter group. When I say 'help', I do not mean giving monetary aid, but rather, words of encouragement or a tactful reasoning session. After all, would you like someone to point out your fault (whatever it may be - everyone undeniably has one) in the eyes of the world and proceed to condemn and put you down? I'm sure anyone sane would answer a solid 'no' to that. Therefore do unto others what you would like others to do unto you.

Admittedly, the Chinese language is gaining more weight of importance in this rapidly-changing world, with many foreseeing a shift in power from the US to China. Yes, the Chinese language may possibly take over the role of English as an international lingua franca in the future. But we must always remember that language is something we can learn and not a talent or exclusivity which only a select group has been born with. And learning is a life-long process - if there is a will, it is not impossible to learn a new language at a ripe old age of 80. So someone who doesn't know the Chinese language now (like me), may very well start learning it in 20 or 30 years time. Is it wrong or criminal? I (and many others in my situation) have the right to choose to learn the language whenever I feel the need arises. After all, it is my life and not knowing a language does not condemn me to hell.

I also acknowledge that not knowing my 'mother tongue' only errodes the conservation of culture and customs passed down through generations. And yes, I'm at fault for being one of the means of this ebbing away of tradition. However, there must be a line drawn between culture and clannishness. Many people fight their case in the name of protecting culture, but ulitmately they are just fighting to keep the status quo in their clan. To inhibit others who physically appear the same as them (but have different mindsets) from going beyond the boundaries of race. And well, frankly I've personally noticed this trend in the people I meet and I think it all boils down on education background and method of upbringing in the family unit. I'm not alone in this observation of the stark difference in the mentality of people of different education backgrounds (of course there are the exceptional cases, which are like diamonds in the dust). Some people just don't get it that academic excellence does not give you a license to be an ass to others!

In lieu with my earlier statement of acknowledging that everyone is different, it is only fair to offer a possible standpoint of 'that person' who chose to condemn a certain group of people (with much support from a couple others who pride themselves of the ability to use the language). Possibly, 'that person' is one who is frank and feel it's alright to issue such statements publicly. I guess it is her right theoretically, so to say, but morally? That's another question altogether. Perhaps she meant well, not intending to offend or undermine people. But again, one must always bear in mind that choice of words is vital in expressing such views (therefore comes into play her proficiency of English - maybe if she'd mastered her English language, she'd be able to conciously avoid stepping on people's tails).

So here ends my sarcastic rebuttal to the issue. Again I remind the reader, that this blog is a ranting ground where most of it is crap but sometimes, just sometimes, the author hopes someone may benefit from it. Happy thinking! The mind is a creative playground where there is no rights and wrongs, just maybes and what-ifs.

Mobilising Lipids

I'm worried. There seems to be some itchiness developing around my eyes. It looks like the skin irritation I have around my lips (as a result of allergies to lipstick).

I can't help but wonder whether all these allergy emergence are linked to me starting to exercise? my clue: the timing (I seem to have a hidden talent to start new things/activities all at the wrong time, making the process of elimination a tricky task).

WARNING and disclaimer: none of the below should be taken seriously... it's just a bit of crap which I was thinking of (there is no basis to its truth or validity).

This is my theory (based on the limited and fast diminishing biochemistry knowledge painstakingly pursued in university). Could it be that my exercising (jogging) has caused my lipids (fats) to be mobilised, hence releasing the lipid-soluble toxins which may have been building up all these years in my body's fat storage? These 'released' toxins then trigger some allergic reaction in my body, producing histamine in excess and causing skin inflammation...

Ok, that might be a heap of crap... but if it has any truth to it, then I can theoretically cure myself by
1) exercising more, thus mobilising more fat and effectively detoxifying my body naturally the slow way
2) stop exercising, and thus stop lipid mobilisation which should the halt the supply of toxins which act as stimulants to the production of histamine

I've not decided what to do yet. However in the meantime, lipice and vaseline (plus many prayers from friends and family members) are helping me tremendously! Perhaps I'll stick with that! :D

Setting Things Right

After sleeping on it, I think my last post may have contained some connotation that my perception of a fun person is one that drinks, do drugs and goes for blind dates etc. Honestly, I don't find much pleasure in those activities (personally). I'm a more laid-back person, preferring to go shopping, reading a good book, appreciating nature and aggravating Zack. However, I feel that what others decide to do in their free time is up to them - it is a matter of personal choice. I'm not one to judge, and I was just stating a preference, not a prescription. So just to set the record straight (for my dear friends/readers whom still drops by this site once a year or so), I've not had a 360 degrees change of heart and have not decided to turn wild! I just need a little change in my life, which I hope will be achieved by adopting the "in life, we must try everything at least once!" motto this year. (that phrase was stressed on by my STPM Chemistry teacher Mrs Tan, in our form 6 days)

What happened in the previous post was just another 'slip' moment of my blabber-mouth. I really need to practice putting a restraint on what I say. Recently, it has caused me to unwittingly step on some people's tails and have become a source of miscommunication. I'd thought that getting older would make me wiser... but it seems to be the opposite case for me! Anyway, every 'slip' has taught me how to handle the situation (damage control). I'm just hoping I'm not too forgetful to repeat the same mistake twice!