year of the dog

the reunion dinner was held at bangsar seafood garden restaurant which was quite ok... maybe because there wasn't any computers/ps2 around to make the kids anti-social... at least there were conversation goin around the kids... the grown-ups were as noisy as ever... food was ok... our table (our room had 3 tables... one for the women, another for the men and the last for the kids) had 11 people (somehow, chairs were dragged from other tables) but we had trouble finishing our food... seemed like only the young ladies (me and LY) were doing the eating!!! and there were so many guys around!!!

spent the rest of the night trying out qwyzzle... i got to level 28 with some help here and there... but i gave up at about 5 a.m. something...

wore my new white crinkle linen skirt with sequin motif on the waist band with a yellow tube and my new vincci heels and kipling bag... it was a really hot day!!! we didn't go for the visiting session at the doctors' house but went to another house in jalan travers where we had a roasted pig... sat there for so long while the adults talked on... at one point the cousins all dissappeared... i thought they had gone back home but apparently they were headed to a cyber cafe... then there was a phone call and all started to panic... there was an accident... LW's car had spun and landed on its side... one of our second cousin had a gash in his head and LW's shirt was soaked with his blood... other than that, everyone was fine... from what i gather, they went in 2 cars... LJ must've drove his dad's mercedes and LW was driving his vitara... don't really know the details... but thank God LK and i didn't follow them...

went back around 6 p.m. ... and we went for a drink at starbucks... i think we did that last year too... had mcD for dinner... had to go last minute shopping at giant wearing my new year clothes... so ambarrassing...

i'm into qwyzzle now... and i'm so happy i managed to solve level 28 tonight without seeing the spoilers... but now i'm stumped at level 32!!! i think i'll jusk take a peek at the spoilers!!! i really had troubles while playing not pron... gave up in the end...

The big 21?

i can't believe that this blog is more than a year old already... i can still remember typing out my "birthday" post a year ago... so how was my 21st birthday? pretty crappy to sum it all up (but of course excluding a very touching event on that day!)...

well it all started with sms birthday wishes from choon sin (the 1st), yen chyng, yan leng, bank islam (huh?!?), mei lin, some unknown chinese message which i presume to be a birthday greeting (hehehe), santhya, rebecca, nadia, nisha, evelyn toh, ah yee, goay imm, lion, sook yeng (the next day... ;-) )

i had 1 class and 2 tutorials that day... so firstly, i went for geology... and the air-cond triggered off my runny nose!!! and after that we went for lunch and my ailment got worse... looked crappy etc... some funny stuff happened (but i'm too lazy to elaborate at the moment)... then we went for our "pengantar alam sekitar" tutorial, and although we were early, some people were already writing out the assignment... we were to have an essay-test assignment which would account for 10 marks out of our finals... and we were too disorientated to start till the tutor came in... and she gave us the 2 topics to write about in BM (others had gotten the titles from their friend.... still can't believe the kiasu-ness of some people!)... and we were given an hour... in which i could not complete one of the essays!!! i was so unprepared for this kinda bullshit tutorial... she asked us to pass up before the promised hour was up!!! we (me, mei lin, li sum, junie, emily) were so dissapointed!!! so there goes 10 marks down the gutter!

LK phoned up to ask me whether i wanted to join his group for dinner and a movie but the problem was he couldn't fetch me because he had to fetch someone else... and so i turned it down and felt so crappy... my own brother not willing to fetch me on my birthday? well i guess that was to be expected (i know the reason and most mothers would know the reason too...) ... i know this is so stupid but i started crying ?!? i guess it was the runny nose and all the other sickness weakening my mind... anyway, i then read my notes to induce sleep (it really works... all the time... if you are an insomniac, you should totally try this!!! hahaha)

then at about 4.40 p.m. i went for my "history and philosophy of science" tutorial... and my runny nose was getting worse... the tutor seemed enthusiastic... he wants to have the tutorials every week... hope he's all that he seems to be... and after that i went back to college to wait for mum

i had to pass up an invitation for dinner at T.G.I.F with some aiesecers because i was really feeling crappy! but anyway, i think i would have felt a wee bit out there... so when mum came, i discovered i had a gift from evelyn and a card from ah yee... evelyn gave me a cute necklace and earring set in pearl and pink stone of the motive of a dog (mind boggling way of explanation...) and i then opened the card ah yee gave me... and there was a cheque for RM1000 in it!!! gosh i was so shock!!! i called ah yee to thank her and somehow (with all the shit i had to put up with the whole day) i started tearing... but of course i covered up by faking a blocked nose... somehow, i always feel emotional on my birthday (but not in company of anyone!)

what did i have for my birthday dinner? i ate chicken rice with "siew yoke" and abit of "bak kut teh"!!! hahaha.... simple but nice... mum said we'd go out for a better meal on saturday at lunch time... which is today!!!

University has made me...

1. learn to walk long distances
2. unvoluntaily exercise everyday
3. learn that you have to be alert (otherwise you'll loose out or get your name on the notice board!)
4. learn that food in university sucks big time
5. realise that walking into the 12th college cafe can immediately silence my hunger pangs
6. realise that there is no such thing as inter-racial unity (all to their own kind)
7. realise that the inability to speak chinese hampers your social life drastically
8. learn that 'nasi goreng biasa' means 'sambal fried rice' (learned it the hard way)
9. learn the various acronyms which we're supposed to know (PBSM, OCBC, JKP, JTK, SA, NA, SS, KPS, API, TNC HEP, SKR, SKET, MAP, DTC... the list goes on... and you'd laugh at the full version of some of these acronyms...)
10. thinner (due to exercise and horrible food)
11. discover people from different backgrounds, their way of thinking etc.
12. discover many places which serve good food (outside UM)... thanks to the clique i hang out with!
13. realise how raw a banana i am!
14. the true importance of tv and internet in my life
15. discover that my fingernails turn purple - blue - icky green whenever i have a bath (no heater ma)
16. experience communal toilets/bathrooms which are really disgusting
17. discover that the 5th floor doesn't have any mosquitoes unless your room is messy
18. learn that proper shoes are important to the wellbeing of your feet
19. realise that wearing a skirt in faculty is a major thing (and wearing a skirt in engineering faculty is a double triple major event!)
20. realise that i spend alot on malay economy rice in KPS... sometimes even more than rm4!!
21. discover that uni can be a very smelly place...
22. the reluctant owner of many uni t-shirts (aiesec, cc family etc)
23. understand that an institute of higher learning doesn't mean that the people there act in an educated manner
24. know that there are great lecturers (prof sam, prof chong) and well, there are the other lecturers...
25. a loner... because of lecture time clashes and other circumstances
26. a lazy bum who does not have any motivation to study and has only got what i got by the grace of God... pngk 3.54 ... lousy...
27. long for my old friends
28. learn how to square dance
29. go mamak-ing more often
30. look for tamer casual clothes (my poor beautiful clothes are under-used!!!)
31. more depressing on this blog...

Broken plans and empty promises... learning to grow up

before i get into the events that concern the title of this post, i just want to mention something about my unexpected shopping spree in summit yesterday! after mom fetched me, we decided on the spur of the moment, to go to summit sj... and we went dvd shopping... bought a couple of them and then we went form shop to shop after that... and i ended up buying 2 skirts... white crinkled skirt with sequin motive on the waist band (which actually my roomate and her friend bought a black version for the 'malam apresiasi'... hehehe) and a yellow short skirt with simple embroidery on it... i like them alot! so that settles my chinese new year garbs... i wasn't planning to get any in the first place... funny that we can always find something nice when we are not looking for something nice!

so, about broken plans... i was supposed to go to petaling street this morning with yen chyng and i cancelled it last night because i had spent too much money yesterday and didn't want to tempt myself anymore... poor girl had to stay in college over night... i wanted to go to petaling street to check out more fake kipling bags... they're not as nicely made as the original ones but the designs are quite nice and different from the shop ones... and i wanted to get some food there and maybe even go for chinese new year shopping... but alas, it was not meant to be...

now, about empty promises... my uni friends were planning to watch memoirs of a geisha and i had asked them to include me if they went... and i just found out that they went today... and not a mention of it to me!! but i can understand that because i don't think i'm really accepeted into their clique... not fun enough ma... but poor mei lin was so distraught when one of them called her up at the very last minute to ask her whether she could fill in because li sum couldn't make it... i mean, even if you wanted someone to fill in, you shouldn't be so frank as to reveal the whole situation... and the worst part of it was that seemingly close friends didn't even breathe a word to her... so i've come to a conclusion that we can't really rely a 100% on our new-found friends in uni... for me, the only person i can actually count on is yen chyng... she doesn't "f.f.k." me... she always tells me earlier if she can't make it or doesn't want to do something...

dwelling on friendship... i learned that the further in we get to the real world, everything (including friendship) is not what it seems to be... the way i see it is that university is just a step away from the real and vicious world... and coming closer to it is making me face reality that in the secular world, almost everything is superficial... this makes me feel like i'm in the process of shedding off the happy and care-free years of childhood... which is abit depressing... like yearning for something that has already passed on... not so many hearty laughs these days... learning to grow up is tough... and now i suddenly understand why some teenagers go astray following the path to destruction... they're forced to face reality and grow up when they weren't ready... so they result to escapism which unfortunately comes packeged with addiction and destruction... i believe everyone has their own special "thing" for escapism but the difference is how harmful are the after-effects... mine's probably reading and my imagination... but not all the time though...

i don't know why i'm in the mood to write stuff that i truely think and believe in my heart today... heavy stuff!!! bringing the mood down... i must post something more cheerful in the future!!!

2nd post from the computer lab

so finally... the day has come and gone... what am i babbling about? the appreciation night! the hotel was mediocre bordering on unsatisfactory... waiters were sloppy and had a face sourer than any lemon you could ever find... but wow! the 12th college people realy outdid themselves!!! it was probably close to a prom night! all the girls (well, at least the chinese...) were dolled up... with little dresses which would definitely get anyone demerited if one wore it in college... in fact i can safeley say that i was probably the chinese girl who was most covered up... by the way, i was wearing mum's ettincelle top (which actually cost rm400 over...) and her skirt... the only things that were mine was my bag and shoes... i think i must've looked so conservative! i thought a college-organized event would mean that college rules still applied! but well, that has proven to be a fib...

anyway, we recieved a Digi starter pack as our door gift... my number was quite nice... easy to remember with lots of 0's in strategic areas (that sounded very ditsy!)... will i keep it? i don't know... do i need it? not really... i don't know whether i should switch from hotlink to digi... my hotlink number seems to be prone to prank callers (which i think roots from some malay or indian bitch who keeps giving out my number and passing it off as theirs to their creepy male acquaintances! i'm not racially discriminating but the callers always ask for some malay or indian girl... plus they don't get it when i say they have got the wrong number, instead they call back >10 times non-stop! talk about freaky creepy people!!!) and i think there's something wrong with my SIM card... sometimes it'll show "emergency calls only"... very inconvenient...
but the bad part is, i have to inform everyone in my address book that i've changed my number... so i think for the time being, i'll just maintain the digi number and see where it takes me...

back to the dinner, we had a chinese style dinner with dishes like shark's fin soup (which was all corn flour and jelly shark fin), salted fish fried rice, roasted chicken, fried fish, vegetable with mushrooms, four seasons and sea coconut dessert with flakey kaya biscuit... i came with mei lin... met li sum in the lobby... met many others there too... our table number was 44!! luckily we weren't superstitious (or at least i am not)!! and to our shock, our table occupants were 4 chinese engineering guys (3 places were empty)!!! and they REALLY looked like engine students!!! even our aiesec friends from engineering faculty agree... and they were so shy... at one point, they ALL started to fiddle with their handphones... and we were like, laughing among the 3 of us!! hahaha... in fact one of their friend from another table came over and chatted us up...hahaha... that was so funny! but at the end of the event, one of the guys asked me to take a picture with him... i hope he doesn't missuse it! i really was quite shocked at the time that that idea didn't cross my mind!

another thing that was quite funny was that everyone (chinese ppl i mean) were taking photos non-stop!!! the others were quite subdued... just siting and looking around... and i saw many chinese girls with shifty eyes... sizing up each other... i think that's an inborn trait in chinese females? perhaps not, but it really is rampant among chinese people... that's what evolved into the "kiasu" mentality... anyway, i took a number of photos too but with mei lin's camera... so i am waiting to get them from her... i think i look goofy (as usual) because mum put a broad layer of eye liner on me and that made me look fierce... wearing make up is just so distressing... too much hassle and inhibits my eating abilities!!! hahaha... hopefully someday i'll get accustomed to it...

now that i think back, i think if i chose to wear something from my wardrobe, i might have looked better... although mum's clothes were really nice and costed more than anyone could imagine and would fit right in if i were amongst 'datins' and the likes... but i think what i usually wear on weekends would have been more outstanding among this crowd of people...

This is unrelated to what i've been dwelling on above but i just had to include it... I got this from an e-mail and think it's very true...

If you think that you can make a difference on your own, then you need to read the words of the poet who wrote "The Indispensable Man":

Sometime when you're feeling important;
Sometime when your ego's in bloom;
Sometime when you take for granted,
You're the best qualified in the room.

Sometime when you feel that your going
Would leave an unfillable hole;
Just follow this simple instruction,
And see how it humbles your soul.

Take a bucket and fill it with water,
Put your hand in it up to the wrist;
Pull it out and the hole that's remaining,
Is a measure of how you'll be missed.

You may splash all you please when you enter,
You can stir up the water galore;
But stop and you'll find in a minute,
That it looks quite the same as before.

The moral in this quaint example
Is to do just the best that you can;
Be proud of yourself, but remember
There's no indispensable man!

1st post from the science faculty computer lab!

my aspirations of going to singapore to see dream theater are becoming paler! LK doesn't seem to hyped about it! oh no!!!

it's really ironic that i can come up with so many things to write about when i'm offline... but once i get to a comp... everything vanishes!

anyway, i'm in my faculty's computer lab... waiting for mom... and just searching for all kinds of nonsense... i now know what "Non plaudite. Modo pecuniam jacite." means... it's a Latin phrase for don't just clap, throw money! (got that phrase from a mensa yahoo!group) and i was reading up on jupitor's moon Europa... but it was quite a bore... and now i'm researching on spontaneous human combustion... which is puzzling as well as comical at moments (yes... that sounds very saddistic!) but really... it is a scary thought to behold... one second you're watching the telly and the next, you don't know what hit you but you're up in smokes and reduced to ashes!!! even your bones have disintegrated... and your skull might even shrink into a size of a baseball!!! SHC seems to happen to older people who consume alcohol and are alone and have excessive fat... however there have been cases with the exact opposite conditions... so all in all, there isn't a satisfactory explanation to spontaneous human combustion!

what's hot at 12th college? it's the apreciation dinner this coming saturday... it's at grand seasons hotel (the one where we used to go with ah yee... and one time... the toilet started overflowing! sheesh!!!) and i thought that it would be some sort of a simple dinner thing (taking into account that college activities and also uni activities are usually not very... err... elaborate? affluent?)... but lo and behold, i've just found out how excited everyone is about this event! it's the talk of the talk!!! people are going gown shopping! new shoes... new hairstyle... i suppose it's the equivalent of prom night! my room mate and her friends are getting new dresses so that they can take a photo and post it on friendster! hahaha... so now everyone who's going is asking around what each other are wearing!

Will I get to see Dream Theater Live?

i totally forgot to mention this... the progressive rock band dream theater are coming to singapore!!! at first i thought they were coming on the 28th of january and for some reason, i kept thinking that the 28th was a friday!!! something wrong with my eyesight!?! and at first i was hopeful... since i didn't have class on friday and i wouldn't be missing 1st day of cny... then i heard it was on the 27th... and still being blur, i thought that was a thursday and started despairing... had classes and a test... but then the test moved up to 26th (sad la... my special day in the year and i have to sit for test!) and i was hopeful again... but not too positive since i still had classes on that day... then today half way through service, i suddenly felt that i'd got something wrong... and after thinking hard about the dates and doing mental counting... i found out that all along i'd got the dates and days all mixed up!!! 27th was a friday... 28th was cny eve and 29th was cny! yahooo.... yipppieeee! so now i'm really hopeful of going to singapore... all i have to do now is renew my passport and push LK into going for it! hehehe... evil plan has already commenced... will i go or not... that is totally unbeknownst to me or anyone...

Why?

why must something simple always turn out to be something impossible? why do some people just love to complicate matters? all my life i've experienced this... right here at home... and everywhere... i'm so sick of it! the way i see it, it's so bloody simple... but people must start worrying about stupid trivial things that are more than likely won't happen... just making it hard for me to have a pleasant day... worry! worry! worry! it is pobably some kind of compulsive paranoia! the worst part of it is that it always has to happen during crucial parts of my life... for instance, spm... gave me so much SHIT! as if i hadn't enough on my mind... he had to add another burden onto my load of worries... although it is very un-christian of me, i'll never forget the reaction and the reluctance to assist! the immediate "NO" response... the emotional trauma it caused... and the feeble attempt for redemption... why do i not see any changes in the person who has been 'saved'? maybe i've set a bad example? am i stumbling someone in their walk of faith?

why do people keep having doubts? do they think they are cleverer, greater, superior to the bible, Jesus and God? why must they always seek a logical and scientific explanation to God? do they actually believe that they can figure out how God works? if that is so, then they are trying to be God rather than get closer to Him! i just can't stand it when someone has this satisfied smirk when they think they've manage to disprove some part of the bible (and still call themselves christian)... because the way i see it, these 'people' have totally missed the point... instead of trying to disprove the bible, they should have spent that time increasing their faith, asking the Lord for direction, trusting in Him and giving their lives to Him...

ok, that was just a stream of angry thoughts... i've unburdened them here and no longer wish to be recalled to them. it may be false and it may be true... but whatever! i'm not publishing a history book here so it doesn't really matter whether the facts are accountable for... this is just a place to crap on = blog... nothing here should be taken too seriously... because i usually blog according to my current emotions...

therefore, i'm after all a girl with emotions!!! i think i have never mentioned this, but lately, i've come to a conclusion that i think more like a guy than a girl... i don't get touched by things other girls cry about... i always end up listening to people's problems rather than exercising my 15,000 word quota a day (maybe one day i'll explode with all these unspent words!!! like rev. bernard ankomah said... a time bomb waiting to explode) ... i don't take forever to get dressed (in fact i can get ready faster than my bro!!!)... i don't keep thinking i'm fat (but i keep hearing it from everyone!!! arghh... it's really getting tiring!)... and i really don't mind getting my hands dirty when the occasion arises (most girly girls would squirm and refuse to do the job...)... but don't get me wrong, i'm not a tom boy... i love wearing skirts and looking pretty and doing other girly stuff, having crushes (but not advertising them)... perhaps this state of mind constitutes that i'm a cold person!?! perhaps that is what deter guys! hahahahaa... that's something to really brood on... but all in all, i'm pretty sure i'm not ready for a bgr... but as some wise friends have pointed out, it'll happen when it happens... can't really plan it out... so be it!!!

Recap: Christmas...

i have totally forgotten to put down something about christmas! well, let me start with christmas eve... we went for our family reunion in bangsar... there was as usual, the western 3 course meal... soup, main and dessert... i put too much pepper in my soup!!!... the rest was... erm... no comment! then for a reason unknown to me and well, probably most of the family, girlfriend-showing-off session started... somehow the old tradition of 'bring girlfriend means going to get married soon' has been broken by the younger ones of our generation... anyway, LK and i were so bored after that... most of our cousins were entertaining the japanese family... so after awhile... while the presents were being disributed, i followed LK to his friends' house... where i was bombarded with cigarette smoke... and felt pretty awkward... but the atmosphere was a total opposite from our christmas party... more laughter and chatting... and alcohol...

next day was CHRISTMAS!!! we went to putra stadium and was slightly late, so we had to sit on the lower balcony... the musical was done by the children with angel gabriel playing trumpet! and the angels having warming up sessions and dancing practise and other activities... the little ones were so cute! and the celtic version of christmas medley songs was so nice... together with the dance team. then after the service, i met choon sin with sam and elizabeth with their children... said our hi and bye... then went about to find ah yee and uncle leong... when we ound them, we all ind of had an awkward reunion thingy... i hadn't seen them in a month! and well, all that i think appropriate to say here is that i wasn't the one who was awkward... so anyway, perhaps this is a start to the renewal and growth of a family relationship? i truly pray it will all turn out well.

so that was christmas 2005 for me... at least the gist of it... besides that, choon sin and i had a long phone conversation till like 2 a.m. right before we went back to uni... i don't think we'll get to do that again any time soon...

New Year, New Dreams, New Life?

So what have i been doing all this while? nothing much... just didn't have the mood to blog... registering for semester 2 courses was a nightmare... i started registering when it was opened at 9 a.m. but by 9.20 a.m., the geology courses were all filled!!! however i managed to secure a spot and another for mei lin during the add and drop week... going back to uni and settling money matters was quite unpleasant... many encounters with rude people (and they are working in an institution of higher learning! Wow... the clerks should go back to kindergarten to learn manners and morals!) with one unpleasant confrontation (not me but a friend but i felt so pissed off)!! somehow, there's something about uni that makes me feel abit depressed... can't actually put my finger on it but it's probably the mentality of the people there and the whole system... so it's really hopeless to hope something will change but rather just go with the flow... that's life!

i had a reunion with part of the hyperactive-chatterboxes in mcD... bought a cake for rachel and gave her a copy of "the 5 people you meet in heaven" for her 21st birthday! although cindy's wearing hear glasses, she looks so chic! like lisa loeb!!! it's just so fun to meet up with this bunch of friends! they're really keepers!!! anyway, we had another meeting on the 31st december and this time, wendy and hock yee came too. rebecca and heng yoong and nashua left before i arrived... we chatted in nando's, SACC... nice place but ugly exterior... the nando's guy was trying to be friendly (not in a bad way) but came out as abrupt and awkward... but nevermind... well, the reunion was nice... probably won't be seeing some of them till middle of next year or so... abit sad la...

went to midvalley megamall and klcc on friday with yen chyng and ban yee... it was really fun... we ate the ikan bakar (i thik the the one near my house tastes better...) and got pulled out to do a survey by this weird malay aunty... i was really worried she was some kind of scammer... but when we went up to the office on the boulevard, we saw some UM friends there who were working part time there... these research companies don't really do their job properly... they falsified data like our age and job etc... anyway it was about an advertisement for skII product. the ad wasn't too good... we got a packet of biscuits... then we went window shopping and after that off to kl... stopped by alliance francaise in ampang and was caught in a jam and heavy rain on the way to klcc... we nearly lost our way... klcc was quite crowded and everything was nice but expensive... we ended up each buying 2 tubes of chocolate coated digestives biscuits! ate mcD's and yummy vanilla with oats and raisins yoghurt! came back around 10 p.m... ban yee sentme home! such a nice gal!

i had my countdown at home and online... ran outside with zack when we heard firecrackers!!! so pathetic... but at least zack understood me when i said "zack, lets go see the fireworks!!!" hehehe... sort of watched i, robot... must sit down and watch it seriously next time!

i went to watch "pride and prejudice" in pyramid with mum and nisha just now... and it was good but like "emma", it was pretty commercialised... not so true to the book as the BBC version but the cast was better looking in general...except that their mr. darcy wasn't as effective as colin firth! kiera knightley was abit too light-headed to my liking... frivolous... and flat-chested... but she had a nice face... mary was prettier than expected... they were horribly poor and heathen-like... but probably that's more validable than the BBC version? anyway, altogether i like the BBC version better because it stays truer to the book!