Monday, January 28, 2013

Annual Post

So another year... and here's just to continue with the tradition of a birthday post (although it's a few days late).

A very quiet one indeed. Had some time to think/reflect due to the long weekend. I've reaffirmed my belief that too much time on hand without a plan is a bad thing. The amount of crap that goes into my mind is incredible! Honestly! An idle mind is the devil's workshop - so true. Maybe its just the genes acting up or reality sinking in. Whatever.

So what did I do with all this negativity? I shoved it. I went out and got myself a motivational book - my actual first self-help book, I would say. My cell leader was right in a way - it's all in the head. My dissatisfaction with my job was mostly in the way I saw things. On good days I was able to accept that this was a really good training ground where I could increase my value. However on bad days, the materialism factor came knocking on my door - but the question then becomes, "When will I be satisfied? A little more??" There will never be a point where we will be satisfied with the amount of pay we get. He had said that money can be earned from other ways besides a 9-to-5 job and salary should be secondary to what we love doing.

By my own thinking, I would really love to do something I believed in whether or not it pays but I guess more often than not, I get pulled into this peer pressure self-seeking frenzy that really screws up my perspectives. Which explains why I'm acting like a typical Gen-Y every few months, re-evaluating whether I was happy with what I had. I should take this verse in January's bible reading plan as my 2013 resolution:

Many are the plans in a person's heart, but it is the Lord's purpose that prevails. (Proverbs 19:21)
Today's sharing at Sunday celebration by YB Hannah Yeoh was touching and very real. I, too should start praying for the Lord's direction - to close doors that are not meant for me, be it in career, relationships and opportunities. I hope I would have wisdom enough to know that failure was a sign.

This year needs to be a year of internal change. Pruning the dead leaves that are dragging me back.

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