Thursday, September 09, 2010

Failing Isn't As Bad As I Thought

This post is late by 3 weeks.

I finally got my results for the last 2 IQS ICSA papers I took in early June - the last, just a day before flying off to Manchester.Somehow at the back of my mind, I thought that I would be able to make it through. I was just hoping for a teeny weeny pass in Corporate Financial Management and in fact I was more doubtful about my Corporate Administration results.

In the end, I passed CA and failed CFM by a scale of 6-10 marks. When I saw the results on my laptop screen, I didn't feel anything - not happy, not sad, not anything. It was weird. I'd thought I would break down and cry in front of the whole office, but I didn't. Not even when I had to announce it to everyone in our weekly operations meeting an hour or so later. In fact I was able to MSN message, SMS, FB message and e-mail my other course mates, informing them of the online release of the results and adding a (;P) to the texts!

I tried analysing my feelings with anyone who would listen. And they all said that it was probably because exams weren't that important to me anymore. So failing wasn't a life-shattering event. And the funniest thing is... I've told almost everyone that I failed my CFM paper (when it is something that I "should" be ashamed of). In fact, my close friends were more worried for me than I was for myself!

Well anyway, I'm taking comfort (if any) in the rumour that CFM had only a 10% passing rate for this sitting. Which means every 9 out of 10 candidates failed the paper. I wonder if 'that certain someone' failed the paper too? Well, we shall see on 30th November...

Above all this non-reaction towards failing, I really thank God for enabling me to pass CA when I was so sure that I would fail it because I was writing whatever that came to my mind and made sense and they were basically the same points for practically every question. And I'm also thankful that He had prepared my heart to accept my results gracefully. I'm glad that despite me creating new financial theories and P&L analysis techniques in the short span of three hours of the answering time allocated, the examiner did not throw out my paper or give me negative marks (below zero)! Well, next time I'll try harder and if I have to think up of new financial theories again, I promise to make them more realistic and logical! ;P

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